those flowers..

as i go down
i go down hard
i'm not surrendering
i'm just saying cause...

i'm in love
with an impossible dream
that keeps me awake at night
and makes my heart scream

for as i go down
i go down fighting
and i shine as bright as the sun
and strike like a flash of lightening

i don't want to feel it
but i find it hard to let go
of your hand and your heart
and your flag, white as the snow

and as i go down
there's no looking back
and i got all the books and boxes
and that good old 8 track

and i won't call either
or use modern technology
i'll let the picture perfect frame
reflect in a memory

cause as i go down
i'm gone forever
and i won't be coming back
in November..

old man

my grandfather is getting old
i can see it in his face, the hard lines, the tired eyes
yea, he's definitely getting old
and i can hear it in his voice
the meek words and soft laughter

that brings a weary smile to those hard lines and tired eyes

that bore out of a hard lived life.

my grandfather is getting old
for i can feel it in his arms
that once held me tightly, now
barely hang on for a few seconds.....

hoping to feel power in my grip

i wonder,where did those hard lines come from?

as each day passes he ages

i can sense it in his being

not too sure if he's coming or going

existing in these times

computers and gadgets, not too sure of the meaning

just being.

aging.

my grandfather is getting old

i can see it in his walk

inches on by, on his way to church

dressed all big and proud

you would never guess those were his tired eyes

and his quiet laughter that you see in the back of the church would you preacher?

yet, he's there, nothing could keep him away.

please note.

my grandfather is skin and bones

and i don't understand how such a strong spirited man

could gradually just fade away

i don't like it, not one bit!

why must my grandfather grow old?

can't he just stay how he was

patriarchal, strong and proud

a man to admire and fear

a man of great virtue and wisdom

the man i remember?

my heart sinks when i see my grandfather

because every day i live with this fear

that i'll wake up one morning and he is no longer there

that those hard lines would stay transfixed on his face

leaving the last image of him with tired eyes

and a glimpse at a hard lived life that too many forget.

but still, my grandfather is getting old and there's nothing i can do about it.

i feel......powerless

untitled (i suppose)

that's the way love goes

(i suppose)

you meet

wine and dine

you sleep together.

you quarrel

you talk

you regret what you said.

you miss each other

you laugh together

you plan a future.

that's the way love goes?

(God only knows)

i sure don't.

on hawthorne street..

somewhere

between an echo

and good-bye

in the cosmos

of the sky

and the twinkling

of an eye

i found..

something

floating in the

sargasso

like a spirited

adagio

smooth

like a piano

i found..

blinding lights

and multicolor

warm bread

and awakened

flowers

fresh march

showers

timeless hours

i found...

chocolate filled

deep rich

soil mixed

alcohol freedom

a cocktail

of praisejoy

redemption

looking back

in the mirror's

reflection

i found

Vanya.

2:14 am

no warm body in my bed

is that why i can't sleep?

watching the pendulum swing

on that old grandfather clock?

how much time left has he got?

what are the marvelous adventures

that run through his mind?

why can't he tell them to me?

why can't i live through

his memories?

oh sweet old man

there's no place i'd rather be

and nothing i'd rather do

than wait on you hand and body

until you're called

until you find your peace

until the voices are silenced

and you can finally get

a good night's sleep

i guess we're in the same boat

is that why i can't sleep?

mama

oh mama

i miss you

you're miles away

but always on my mind

i'll see you soon

where the sun shines

and the joy of your heart seeps into mine.