where were you when i needed you?

you know what, i'm kinda pissed off. but who am i really pissed off at more though, you or me??? it's like you think you could just come and go as you please ya know, and that pisses me off But then again i gotta take some of the blame too i mean, it's not like i put up too much of a fight when you saunter in, boy, i must seem like a real push over dread, or am i that hard up? and i stay here and watch you on your little escapades, and say nothing. when you left, you didn't even look back ya know, you started your life happily without me, and when i needed you the most you were nowhere, yet you're back here again. FUCK!!!
you're so lost though, sometimes i feel as though you need me in your life, some guidance or even stability or something, what is it you want? what is it you need? why do i care? i don't even know if i have it in me to care anymore dread, and that's the part that bothers me the most, i just somehow always thought i would always care for you, always and it kinda pains me in a way that someone i once loved so deeply, now i feel......nothing.
where were you when i needed someone to listen, to cry with, to trust, to just be there....nowhere
so don't blame me now that you're nothing to me, don't blame me